It’s been a while
It’s been a while but truth be told, I kind of forgot about this blog for a while and when I did remember and wanted to write, well, life got in the way. I think I need to get back to writing to get rid of the angst (anger) I still deal with on a daily basis.
Catch up time (to the best of my ability)
The last 4 years have been trying to say the least. When Michael died (coming up on 8 years in 2 days), it took over 15 months for the doctors to figure out what was wrong with me. It seems I have an auto immune disease called Mast Cell Activation Disease. I am on more meds than I can even mention, liquid meds as well as capsules. I now see a specialist in Boston every 6 months (I graduated from every 3 months to 6). I found out after he died that be believed I was dying and didn’t tell him. Suffice it to say, it was a horrible 15 months. I was so sick I even got state disability the first time I applied.
Things were relatively quiet from after Michaels death till his birthday on Feb 5, 2016. That was the day hell reached up laughing and took us on on yet another rocky road to hell and back. We found out that day my sisters husband was going to lose his toes on one foot if not the whole foot. He never took care of his diabetes. They did take his toes and he just wasn’t right after that, he died in March of 2016. The same day, Feb 5, my youngest brother found out he had stage 5 lung and brain cancer, which went to his bones later on. He never smoked a day in his life, yet he had lung cancer. They attribute it to 9/11, the hell that just keeps taking. He worked downtown in the financial district and breathed in all that crap every day. He fought valiantly, never lost his sense of humor and never ever asked why me. He died one month after he turned 52 on July 29 2018. I forgot another one, my father had died when he was 42 and left my mom to raise 6 kids. After a while she found her second love, he died Oct 2015. So in an eight year period, we buried 6 immediate members of our family.
While at the repast for my brother, my daughter found out she was pregnant and more than likely she was going to lose the baby. My sister in law is a nurse and works for an OBGYN, her daughter is also a nurse and works in the labor and delivery. They didn’t like what they were hearing and after the repast, they had us drive to S. I. to see my sister in laws doctor. She told her the same thing, the pregnancy wasn’t viable and she would lose it.
We actually went to Ireland a few days later, expecting a miscarriage, it never happened. Two weeks later when we got home, she had had another ultra sound and there was the most amazing sound, loud and clear there was a heartbeat. She was pregnant, she just messed up her birth control and conceived later than she thought.
God does make in mysterious ways !!!